Created and Restored — I Owe Him Myself Twice Over

✦ She Longs and Faints

Bernard gives the believing soul a voice — and the voice is a woman's. She longs. She faints. She rests. She glories. The soul in Bernard's vision is the Bride — the dove of Christ — longing for the Bridegroom with a longing that is not passive but consuming. She longs and faints for God.

And where does she rest while she waits? In the contemplation of Him. Not in the resolution of her problems. Not in the improvement of her circumstances. In the thought of His abundant kindness. The contemplation itself is the resting place. The kindness itself is the green pasture. The soul does not wait for heaven to begin resting — she rests now, in the thought of who He is.

And she glories — not in her own righteousness, not in her own devotion — in the reproach of the Cross. The Cross that the world calls shame, the believing soul calls glory. And she will glory there until the glory of His face is revealed — when the contemplation by faith becomes the seeing face to face. 🙏

✦ Altogether

Bernard makes a claim so vast that he pauses to acknowledge he is venturing beyond what words can hold: the Holy Trinity altogether loves us. Not the Father alone. Not the Son alone. Not the Spirit alone. Altogether. The infinite and incomprehensible Godhead — essentially one — loving with all of Himself.

This is not a divided love — one Person contributing patience, another contributing mercy, another contributing power. The whole of God loves the whole of you. The Trinity is not a committee that voted to love. It is one God — infinite, incomprehensible, undivided — who loves with all His heart. Bernard says: if we may venture so to speak. Because the reality exceeds the language. But the truth must be spoken, even if the words fall short. 🙏

✦ Plenteous Redemption — Preserved Forever

Bernard stacks the titles: Preserver. Portion. Glory. Three names for three needs. The soul needs preserving — He is the eternal Preserver. The soul needs an inheritance — He is the portion. The soul needs glory — He is the glory itself. Everything the soul needs, He is.

And the redemption is not scarce. Plenteous. Psalm 130:7. Not barely sufficient. Not rationed carefully. Plenteous. The bags of mercy that have never been untied. The river that rose to uncrossable. The blank check signed by a rich friend. And it was obtained once — once — in the holy place. Not repeated. Not renewed annually. Eternal redemption, obtained once, sufficient forever.

And the preservation — He forsakes not His godly ones; they are preserved forever. Not for a season. Not until the next trial. Forever. The Shepherd who never departs. The Father who is with Him on the Mount of Olives. The Comforter who abides. Preserved — not by their own strength, but by His faithfulness. 🙏

✦ Eye Has Not Seen

Bernard gathers the promises of bounty and glory — and each one exceeds the one before. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over. Not just full — overflowing. The provision of God is not measured carefully to avoid waste. It is pressed down to make room for more, shaken together to eliminate gaps, and then — running over. The bounty exceeds the vessel.

And beyond the bounty — eye has not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man. Bernard lets Paul's words stand in their full, staggering scope. The things God has prepared are not merely beyond expectation. They are beyond imagination. The eye — the sharpest sense — has not seen them. The ear — the most receptive sense — has not heard them. The heart — the deepest capacity of the soul — has not conceived them. They exist beyond the reach of every human faculty.

And the final promise — the vile body changed, fashioned like His glorious body. The wretched machine replaced. The egg hatched. The pencil lines overwhelmed by the real landscape. Glorified. Not improved. Not repaired. Transformed — into the likeness of His glory. 🙏

✦ A Far More Exceeding and Eternal Weight of Glory

Bernard lets Paul settle the question of suffering with two verses that put every earthly trial on one side of a scale — and eternity on the other. The sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared. Not that they are unreal. Not that they don't hurt. Not worthy to be compared. The scale is so unbalanced that the comparison itself is absurd. The sufferings are real — but the glory is so vast that the sufferings disappear into it the way a candle disappears into the blaze of the risen sun.

Our light affliction, which is but for a moment. Paul calls it light. Paul — who was beaten, shipwrecked, stoned, imprisoned, left for dead — calls his affliction light. Not because it didn't weigh anything. Because the glory on the other side of the scale weighs far more exceedingly. The affliction is for a moment. The glory is eternal. The affliction is light. The glory has weight — an eternal weight that makes the suffering feel like nothing in comparison.

And the key — while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. The suffering is seen. The glory is not yet seen. And the soul that looks at the suffering will be crushed by it. But the soul that looks at the unseen — that soul finds the affliction light and the glory heavy. The looking determines the weight. 🙏

✦ Not My Life Only — But Himself

Bernard reaches the question that every grateful soul must ask: what shall I render? The benefits are piled so high — redemption, preservation, bounty, glory, the transformation of the body, the weight of eternal glory — that the soul stands before the pile and says: what could I possibly give back?

Reason says: give yourself wholly. You owe everything you have and are. But faith says more. Faith shows that the debt is not merely for life. He has given me not my own life only, but even Himself. The gift was not just the breath in the lungs and the days on the calendar. The gift was God Himself. The I AM — given. The Son — delivered up. The Spirit — poured out. God gave God. And the soul that receives that gift owes more than reason can calculate — because the gift exceeds the capacity of reason to measure.

✦ Why Should Not the Creature Love

Bernard makes the claim so reasonable that denying it would be absurd. God asks for all — all heart, all soul, all might, all being, all knowledge, all powers. And Bernard says: of course He does. Why should not the creature love the Creator who gave him the power to love? The very capacity to love is a gift. The heart that beats with devotion was made by the One it beats for. The soul that rises before dawn to meet God was given its wakefulness by the One it rises to meet.

It is by His gift alone that he can do anything that is good. Every good thing — gift. Every act of love — gift. Every morning devotion — gift. The creature who gives all to God is only returning what was given. And the return is not unjust — because the gifts were given precisely so they could be returned. The heart was made to love Him. The soul was made to worship Him. The strength was made to serve Him. The giving-back is the purpose of the giving. 🙏

✦ The Arithmetic That Will Never Balance

Bernard builds the calculation — and then breaks it. In the first creation, He gave me myself. Out of nothingness — nothing contributed, nothing earned, nothing deserved — God raised the creature to dignity. The first gift: existence. The self that is. The life that breathes. The soul that can think and love and know. All given. All from nothing.

In the new creation, He gave me Himself. The second gift — infinitely greater than the first. Not just life — but God. Not just existence — but union with the Source of existence. And by giving Himself, He restored the self that was lost. The self that sin destroyed, the self that was trampled under the foot of the law, the self that lay in a cheap apartment waiting for a Prince to stoop — restored. Not repaired. Restored. Given back. Made new.

Created first and then restored — I owe Him myself twice over. Once for creation. Once for redemption. The first self was a gift. The restored self is a gift. Both are His. And the soul that gives both back is only returning what was given.

But then Bernard asks the question that shatters every calculation: what have I to offer Him for the gift of Himself? The self — given twice — can be returned twice. But what about the gift of God Himself? What can the creature offer in return for the Creator? Could I multiply myself a thousand-fold and then give Him all — what would that be in comparison with God? Nothing. A thousand selves are nothing compared to one God. The debt of love is infinite — because the gift is infinite. And the arithmetic will never balance. The only response is not to try to balance it — but to love. With all the heart. All the soul. All the might. Knowing it will never be enough. And loving anyway. 🙏